Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Chocolate vs. Sex

It's official - most women prefer chocolate to sex.
New research reveals that 53% of the adult UK female population - around 12 million women - would rather have a nibble than nookie. A staggering 89% confessed to experiencing physical cravings for chocolate and one in five admitted they couldn't go a day without chocolate.

The poll of 2,500 women was conducted by Red Letter Days, to coincide with the launch of two chocolate-themed experience days.

Over 40% of females said they get 'cranky' if deprived of their choccy fix and 37% consider it an "integral part" of their day. Men, on the other hand, would always plump for sex over chocolate (78%).

And despite both sexes consuming the same average amount of chocolate a week - the equivalent to six small bars - men are less likely to admit their addiction.Only 33% of guys declared they were chocoholics, compared to 51% of girls.
So which is better - Chocolate or Sex? Well a quick web search came up with several thousand hits and several lists of why chocolate is better. Here is a sampling of what I consider some of the better reasons:
1. You can GET chocolate.
2. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft!
3. If you bite the nuts too hard, the chocolate won't mind!
4. You can make the chocolate last as long as you want!
5. You can ask a stranger for chocolate without being slapped.
6. The word "commitment" doesn't scare off chocolate.
7. Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant.
8. You can have chocolate at any time of the month.
9. Good chocolate is easy to find.
10. Size doesn’t matter, it's always good!
11. A chocolate will always respect you in the morning.
12. With a chocolate, the toilet seat is always the way you left it
13. A chocolate never suffers from performance anxiety.
14. Chocolates are easy to pick up.
15. You can fondle chocolates in a supermarket.
16. ...and you know how firm it is before you take it home.
17. Chocolates never need a round of applause.
18. Chocolates don't leave whisker burns, fall asleep on your chest, or drool on the pillow.
19. A chocolate doesn't turn your bathroom into a library.
20. Chocolates don't leave wet towels or dirty shorts on the floor.
21. A chocolate won't eat all your food or drink all your liquor.
22. After telling your chocolate bar all your worries you can simply eat it.
23. A bar of chocolate doesn’t bore you by constantly talking about sports.
24. Chocolates don't hog the remote.
25. Chocolates can stay up all night...
For even more reasons check out; http://www.doe.carleton.ca/~mbritton/archive/pot.offensive/chocolate.vs.sex.html

For the record, I'm not opposed to men or sex, it's just REALLY hard to find one that is worth the effort. If I ever do find one that's better than chocolate - I'm not sharing!



leelu said...

Last night after I took my husband out for his birthday, we came home and ate this - sex never even came up - this is too good!

dnsyl57 said...

OH MY GOD!!! I AM SO JEALOUS!! That cake looks amazing! I'm drooling on the keyboard! Not a champagne person but I think I could make an exception for that one!

If the link leelu provided does not work, please copy and paste the url to check out this sinful creation!

leelu said...

With no sense of smell, I didn't pick up on the champagne at all. My husband said it was "complex," so maybe that means he noticed it! But that dark chocolate shell was incredible!
Since it's only 4" tall, I couldn't resist splurging for his bday. hee hee